Hobbeeb's Case 1
by someguy33
Summary: Not really DBZ, but its got DBZ peoples!


/  
HOBBEEB AND THE CASE OF THE MIGRATING COCONUTS -  
-  
STORY #1 BY B-Rad E-mail: (lol, i have dial-up)

NOTE TO READERS: All misspelled words are spelled wrong on purpose  
NOTE TO READERS: This story is rated PG  
NOTE TO READERS: Hobbeeb, Karl and all other characters are property of either me or some friends.  
NO COPYING CHARACTERS  
NOTE TO READERS: I'M A FRIEND OF COTTON CANDY ZARBON, SO SHE LET ME USE HER CHARACTERS

CHAPTER 1  
HOBBEEB STARTS OFF 

One day, the genetic mutation named Hobbeeb said to himself"Why   
not start a Detective buisness?" So, he did. He called it "Detec  
iv fore Uyo." For 7 months, nothing happened. But, one day, a s-  
trange person called. "I have a case for you." said the retard on  
the other end. Hobbeeb, raising his right eyebrow, replied "Okay  
Shoot me." The retard said "I have heard of a story about coconu  
ts migrating to warmer climes. Can you check it out?" Hobbeeb was  
so amused he wrote "XD,""LOL,"and"HAHA!" on a piece of paper. Wh  
en he was done writing chatroom messages on napkins, he replied   
to the really wierd Guy on the phone, or as it is in Hobbeeb's h  
ome, a soup can that strangly picks up phone calls. Hobbeeb said  
"OK, whatever. Just let me travel to HFIL." The other dude said   
"HFIL?" Hobbeeb replied "HOME FOR INFINTE LOSERS." With that, he  
hung up the "phone". /  
--------------------/

CHAPTER 2  
TRIP TO HFIL 

Hobbeeb got ready. It was a long trip to the disturbing HFIL. He  
Got his trusty side kick, Karl, to come with him. On the way, Ka  
rl had to pee. "C'mon, Karl. You went before you left!" Karl said  
"Yeah, I know. But I gots ta pee!" Hobbeeb was angry, but he pul  
led into a Gas Station, which marked to speration of the Real Wo  
rld and HFIL. When they finally reached the Hell imatator, Bardo  
ck approached. He was followed by Lovely Frieza, GoGohan, and Ce  
ll, who was wearing a Kilt. Hobbeeb knew that everyone became gay  
if they stayed here to long so he went fast. "I need MY car." he  
said. Lovely Frieza replied in a VERY gay way "Oh Hobbeeb, pleas  
e, stay with us." GoGohan butt in saying "We rarley have visitor  
s." Then Cell came. He said "Hobbeeb, you must wear my kilt!". H  
obbeeb backed away. Then, Bardocks speedo poped off. Hobbeeb got  
out, and fast. "Now," he said, "the adventure is begginning..." /  
---------------------------------------------------------------/

CHAPTER 3  
THE TROPIC WIERDO 

"Ahhhh." said Hobbeeb lazily as he and Karl drove through the Ha  
wian landscape. "Hey, didn't dat retard on da phone say dat dem   
cocunuts was migratin' from here some wheres?" Hobbeeb said "Yeah  
I think so." They stopped and made camp in the shade of a big pa  
lm tree next to the road. After sitting there for 4 hours, they   
started to wonder if they'd been tricked. "Karl, wanna get some   
bananas?" Karl replied "Sure. But make sure dat dey ain't all br  
own." Karl thought that he would go to a store, but Hobbeeb just  
climbed the tree. The bananas fell and hit Karl on the cranial a  
rea. Hobbeeb called from the tree "Sorry!" Karl flicked Hobbeeb   
off. Just as Hobbeeb was about to kill Karl, they heard a sound   
that sounded like Carlos with a cotton ball in his throat, becau  
se it WAS Carlos with a cotton ball in his throat. "CARLOS! YOU   
OK?!?!" yelled Karl. Carlos puked up cotton. "OK guess you are."  
said Hobbeeb. "Yo Carlos. Have ya seen any flyin' cocunuts?" said  
Karl. Carlos said "Yes, I think that, I, Carlos, have seen flying  
coconuts. In fact, I, Carlos, have photographed them." Karl said  
"Can we see it?" "Sure." Carlos said. When they saw the odviously  
drawn pic, they got an idea. "Maybe if we make it a girl, we can  
attract a boy one and he'll come to us." Said Karl. The sound of  
crickets churping echoed through the night. "Rrrrrriiiiiggghhhtt  
said Hobbeeb. After a few minutes, Carlos went on. But, something  
else was a coming... /  
--------------------/

CHAPTER 4  
THE GUY WITH GUM 

As they watched as the REALLY big dude walked up, Hobbeeb and Ka  
rl played poker. "CRUDD! YOU GOT 2 ROYAL FLUSHES AND I GET A PAI  
R!!!!" yelled Karl. The big guy came into view and said "Nnnnii  
"Wait a tick? Are you that guy from Montey Python and the Holy   
Grail?" The big guy said "No. But, I have repoerts that the crew  
of HFIL has escaped." Hobbeeb was shocked. "NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! THE  
WORLD IS COMING TO AN END!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Just then, Bardock came  
still missing his speedo. "It is no longer HFIL. It is now HFFL  
Hobbeeb had a REALLY blank look on his face. "HFFL?" "Home for   
Fabulous Losers." crickets crikets. Then, Hobbeeb pulls out his  
rake and smacks Bardock. "PUT YOUR SPEEDO BACK ON!!!!!" Bardock   
runs off naked as a jay bird. Then, Lovely Frieza came with adds  
about his clothing lines. He was followed by GoGohan and Cell,   
Who was STILL wearing a kilt. They ran after Bardock. "Oh great  
said Hobbeeb. "Now I have to deal with coconuts AND gay DBZ char  
acters!" Just then, Samus Aran came in. "I'm looking for the gay  
DBZ guys. Where'd they go?" "That way." said Hobbeeb. Samus ran.  
"Dang she's hot." said Elijha, a friend of Hobbeeb. "Elijha, have  
you seen any migrating coconuts?" Elijha said he didn't. Then, R  
ick James came. "I'm Rick James, #$&!!!" "Rick, this is a PG s  
tory!!!" "Oh." Said Rick. Then, they heard the sound of... Cocon  
uts... /  
------/

CHAPTER 5  
WE SEE THE COCONUTS

"OH MY GOD!!!!!" yelled Karl. "THE COCONUTS!!!!" yelled Hobbeeb.  
"So the retard was right after all." said Hobbeeb. Just then, the  
coconuts started bombarding them with all sorts of crap: Knives,  
straws, spitballs, crap, more crap, mud, and other pornographic   
toys that I can't mention legally on a public web site. Just the  
n, Bardock returned with his speedo accually on his body. As Rick  
James stepped away with his right eye twitching, he stands there  
in amazment at the retardedness of this story. Then, Lovely Frie  
za, GoGohan, Cell (still wearing a kilt), King Cold and his biki  
ni, Mr. Zarbon, and everyone else from HFIL...er...I mean...HFFL  
crew. Cell excliamed "We should have a Tea Party!" GoGohan said   
"Grab the toys!!!!" Bardock pulled off his speedo. "Gimme one,   
GoGohan!!!" Lovely Frieza said "We should travel to the nation of  
Highly Ungifted Waywos!!!!" Hobbeeb said "What?.......bad mental  
pictures...They hurt." "GoGohan, gimme a toy!" yells Bardock.   
GoGohan hands Bardock a G.I. Joe doll. "GoGohan, you make me mad  
Then, Cell Gives Zarbon his kilt. "It smells like #$&#!!!"   
((Narrorator: Psss.. Hey... think PG now......!))   
Zarbon gives Cell his kilt back. "But i wanted you to wear my ki  
lt!!!" yells Cell. Then Hobbeeb slowly walks away. But GoGohan   
grabs his "rear-region" and said "Come back and play with the   
Toys!!" said GoGohan. Hobbeeb Sits in shock as he comes to grips  
that some body just grabbed his "rear-region."Hobbeeb turns to   
see GoGohan smiling over himself. Instead of creaming him Hobbeeb  
just turned away and lefted the GAY dbz peoples alone. As he   
lefted He said to Karl" That...Was the most....scary, most   
disturbing event to ever happen in my presence." Just then, Cell  
came back Froliking through the sand. "Come back, Hobbeeb and   
Karl."   
((Narrorator: Que titanic music.))   
Little John's "Get Low" music plays   
((Narrorator: Wrong music, Carlos!))   
titanic music plays   
Hobbeeb put the pedal to the metal. But, then, he remembers...his  
C-130!!! He uses his little device and in an instant, the huge   
aircraft appeared. blip blip. He climbs in the thing and turns  
it on. But, it doesn't work. He goes out and beats each engine   
into submission with a rake, the same one used in the beating of  
Bardock. It turns on, and lefted without him.   
((Narrorator: Music))   
To the windooooooooow to the wall, to the wall...   
((Narrorator: Carlos I will end you!))   
sound of dying record player.   
Carlos runs across scene being chased by man in a suit, yelling  
and cursing "OK that was wierd." says Hobbeeb. Then, Cell grabs him. GoGohan  
comes up and... /  
---------------/

INTERMISSION:  
I HOPE YOU BROUGHT ICIES!  
YOU WANT SOME BUTTER FOR YOUR POPCORN? I'LL GIVE YOU SOMETHING YELLOW, AND IT'S NON-DAIRY, TOO!  
GO GET SOME SNACKS. MAYBE A CARBONATED BEVERAGE?

INTERMISSION OVER   
Finally, Hobbeeb got GoGohan and Cell of of him. "You...evil...D  
BZ things." said Hobbeeb. Just then, the flying coconuts came. A  
nd, the cases conclusion: THE COCONUTS WERE CARRIED BY SWALLOWS.  
Finally, Hobbeeb went home. He kicked off his rain boots, and fe  
ll asleep. /  
----------/

THE END

PEOPLE I GOTTA THANK OR THEY'LE KILL ME:  
1. TREY EDWARDS- CREATOR OF HOBBEEB 2. JESSICA- CREATOR OF THE GAY DBZ CHARACTERS 3. ME- I WROTE THE STORY, SO I AM REALLY, REALLY, REALLY TIRED. DO NOT E-MAIL ME AND TALK ABOUT HOW BAD MY STORY IS OR I'LL HUNT YOU DOWN AND GUT YOU LIKE A FISH. GOT IT? GOOD.

OTHER PEOPLE THAT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS:  
1. BILL COSBY 2. MEL GIBSON 3. RONALD McDONALD 4. ELVIS 5. AHSLEY SIMPSON 6. CHI-CHI

PEOPLE WHO BUGGED ME WHILE WRITING THIS:  
1. MY BROTHER, BILL 2. MY SISTER, BOB (DON'T ASK)  
3. MY COUSIN, SEMORE BUTTS (ALSO DON'T ASK)  
4. MY ANNOYING YELLING BRAIN TELLING ME TO STOP

ABOUT ME:  
I'm an avid fan of DBZ. I was there when the first Dragonball Z episode came out to when Dargon Ball AF started. It is currently 4:35 AM right now. And it is really hard to spelll correctly. My name is Eric Edwards. I'm 13 years old.  
My back hurts and my computer is REALLY loud.  
WTF am I sitting here? I'm going to bed.

WATCH OUT FOR NEXT STORY:  
HOBBEEB AND THE WITCHES SPELLL ("SPELLL" WAS SPELLED LIKE THAT ON PURPOSE) 


End file.
